Twitter
Facebook
Flickr
RSS
Saturday, March 27, 2010
A Note to Doubters and Drag-me-Downers: Get the Hell Out of My Way
Let me begin with an apology.
To whom, I'm not sure, as I doubt people scan my posts and think, "I should totally read this fun little blog that somehow makes me want to go on a week-long grain alcohol binge and slit my wrists!" My small handful of comments prove there are some sorry bastards who do read this clap-trap. (What were you thinking?)
Sorry guys, I've been in a bit of a rut lately. I've had some not-so-fun things to mull over the last few months, and my depressingly morbid thoughts tend to find their way here. Whatever, it's my blog, so fuck off and quit judging me.
I have been shedding an old skin of mine, so to speak. A flaky, decaying old self that I want to peel off in disgust and discard forever. In practice, this proves to be much harder than it sounds.
Quarter life crises are a real bitch. My twenties are more than half over now, as the little freshmen shitheads (sophomores, juniors, seniors) who I still have to share classes with, seem to get younger by the day. Their taught little bottoms and shapely, nicely-tanned thighs just make me sick, as I realize I won't be in my "prime" forever: (I recently espied an ever-so-slight fine line under my eye, and nearly had a break down.) I know now that I've pissed away so many of my years being of young and pretty by mercilessly criticizing my looks. Doubting myself. Underachieving, far below my capabilities. Being too afraid to give myself a chance to be better. I honestly believe that people embrace negativity and self loathing. They (= me) cling to it, because it is familiar.
Dare I say comforting.
And that, boys and girls, is sad.
BUT, better late in getting my shit together than never, I always say.
*** Totally unrelated, but this one is a winner. Please read, and enjoy. You're welcome.
At My Wedding - w4w - 26 (NW Tucson)
Date: 2010-03-27, 9:25AM MST
Were you the tall blonde woman sitting at the back of the church at my wedding. I couldn't take my eyes off of you and you seemed to have an interest in me. I was so tired up with my new husband and family at the reception I didn't have time to seek you out and see what your intentions were, but I want you to know that I am very interested. The wedding was more for "show and tell". Sorry I haven't contacted you sooner, but we didn't have internet on our honeymoon. But hopefully you and I can get together for a meanful relationship.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
0 comments (+add yours?)
Post a Comment